5 things closer to the definition of happiness.

  • Green tea in the morning. And in the afternoon. And in the evening. Several times. And then once more.

Tea time!

I have been shown the greatness of tea. I have struggled, I have tried to make my way out of this tea craziness that’s going around lately, but there’s only so much fight in me… My mother is a complete tea-freak, any kind at any time with no sugar and no milk – that would be tea blasphemy! My brother has green tea every morning. One of my friends is as addicted as I am to Starbucks Chai Tea Latte so he decided to begin buying that kind of tea. Now, in the event of a zombie apocalypse, he’d have a year’s supply of the goddamned thing! Another one of my friends is clinging to his homeland kind of tea as if it was his only british identity reminder. So I could safely say that my newly discovered love for tea (with no milk in it) has been an orchestrated plan, and that I had no say in it whatsoever. Tea has officially become a hipster thing.

  • Emails.

Lately I’m receiving loads and loads of emails, mostly spamming the hell out of me, but from time to time I also get these unexpected nice and sweet emails. Emails telling me not to lose my faith in humanity (literally). Emails with songs that speak of someone that I don’t recognize, but that they swear it’s supposed to be me. Emails with funny pictures and with embarrassing videos that give me too much power for my own liking. What can I say? I am a sucker for emails.

  • Sketching while watching a TV- Show.

I am getting into my last row of exams, so most of my day is spent on dwelling on the fact that I have to study and on the actual act of studying. It’s a very lonely task. So when the nighttime comes, I am out of my mind and I need to do something to make it stop reeling. But I don’t have much time because I have to go to bed relatively early in order to get up early aswell. So, I multitask. I have dinner while I am watching a TV-Show (now it’s the West Wing) and while at the same time I do some sketches on my brand new sketchbook! How do I pull it off? No idea – I am surprised that there’s no ketchup stain in any of my drawings. I can say without a doubt that this moment is the happiest moment of my day. I know there is no obligation waiting for me afterwards, I know I get to sleep and rest when I’m done and it’s nearly the only moment that I actually have to spend some quality time with my family. Bliss.

  • Kings of Leon.

I was way too late to this party. How I had never heard anything by them before is something that escapes my logic. I was at a friends’ house when I first heard “Sex on fire”, and I only paid attention to it because it said the word “sex” (sue me!). Now not only do I think that “Sex on fire” is not one of their best songs (I can’t understand why it is the most famous one… I guess sex is a very attracting advertising theme), but I also have their entire discography and know most of their lyrics. There’s actually a joke going around about my obsession with Kings of Leon and my friends have started communicating with me through lyrics from their songs. What they don’t seem to understand is that I’m not bothered by it, so the teasing loses its purpose.

  • Cheese. And pizza… with extra cheese.

cheese-pizza

Self-explanatory.

Weekend Recollection

It’s been a really weird weekend. A really violent-fun-nice-wannamurderyou kind of weekend. It’s been nice and fun because I had the opportunity to finally meet someone that I’ve come to really care for after a few years of Tumblr/Twitter/Facebook interaction. He’s a talented musician (my absolute favourite among his pieces is “The Departure”; you can listen to it here), a master of film criticism (here’s his website, although it’s in Spanish) and a good friend who understands me and the situations I usually go through because he has experienced them first, and knows better than anyone the prize that comes with frustation and failure when you know how to transform those feelings into art form. Nothing I could say about him would make him justice, so just click on the links above and let his brilliance do the talking.

It’s been a violent wannamurderyou kind of weekend because some things have happened that have made me stop believing in human race. Well, yeah, I am exaggerating, but the fact that I am incredibly disappointed in someone I never thought I would have a problem with remains. And because I am who I am, I have extrapolated my anger to everyone surrounding the offender (I’m as nice as I sound). Right now, I hope red wine and cheese are being placed on a tray so I can get bribed into forgiveness. And it will work because the way into any respectable woman’s heart is always red wine and cheese. If she doesn’t like either one of those things, run! She is not to be trusted.

Anyway, I have painted A LOT. Those of you who follow me on Facebook know it. I’ve been doing something slightly different, though. I’ve been focusing a bit more on male portraits because I want to master them before I start doing the more serious portraits I plan to do: real people portraits. And by real people I mean the people around me; family members, friends etc. Here’s what I’ve got so far:

I don’t want to finish this post without some sort of musical reference, without a soundtrack.  Somehow it’s easier for me to process certain events when there’s a song in my head portraying such events or my reactions towards them. What can I say? Sometimes I’m that melodramatic…

Single book of matches, gonna burn what’s standing in the way
Roaring down the mountain, now they’re calling on the fire brigade
Bury all the pictures and tell the kids that I’m ok
If I’m forgotten you’ll remember me for a day

I, I won’t ever be your cornerstone, I

All the black inside me is slowly seeping from the bone
Everything I cherished is slowly dying or it’s gone
Little shaking babies and drunkards seem to all agree
Once the show gets started it’s bound to be a sight to see

I won’t ever be your cornerstone
I don’t wanna be here holding on
 I won’t ever be your cornerstone, I

WATCH HER RUN, CAN YOU FEEL IT? 

 I won’t ever be your cornerstone
 I don’t wanna be here holding on
 I won’t ever be your cornerstone
 I don’t wanna be holding on

Cold Desert

While I love music and I am always listening to some new band that I’ve recently discovered, I am very picky when choosing my real favourites. A song may become a favourite because the rythm just makes me feel a bit more positive, because it helps me channel whatever I am actually feeling. Other times, I fall in love with a song because its lyrics speak directly to me, assuring me that I am not insane, or because it reminds me of past times. Or of someone.

The song that I’m about to show you automatically got a place in my heart because of the ambience that surrounded me while it made its way through my eclectic Iphone playlist. Sometimes I download loads of band’s records only because I enjoyed one of their songs so I’m usually not familiar with the rest of them. Today I was walking back home from my university. It was raining and it was freezing -I was very smart and only got a jacket with me thinking that, being May, I hardly was going to be cold- but I was craving the exercise and walking under the rain is something I’ve learnt to love in the past few years. I was in a weird, depressing, sad, emo mood, and the cloudy sky was not helping… not that I really wanted it to. Once in a while it’s nice to let yourself feel sad; to embrace the feeling without having to cover the apparent weakness in front of others.  I believe there is a certain beauty in sadness. I think it’s healthy to be sad, from time to time.

And I didn’t feel it coming this morning. The sadness, I mean. The intense need to let myself go and enjoy the lack of resistance towards the emotion. It was liberating and I felt strangely comfortable in the loneliness and the anonymity that a big city provides in the early hours, when shops are still closed and coffee places are starting to serve the so much needed caffeine to the few early risers. I wasn’t able to put a finger on what was making me feel that way, but I welcomed it while this song said what my brain probably hadn’t been able to process by itself.

The brokenhearted voice made me smile. It was nice to be feeling something. Anything.

This is my new favourite:

  I’m on the corner, waiting for a light to come on
That’s when I know that you’re alone
It’s cold in the desert, water never sees the ground
Special unspoken without sound

You told me you loved me, that I’d never die alone
Hand over your heart, let’s go home
Everyone noticed, everyone has seen the signs
I’ve always been known to cross lines

I’ve never ever cried when I was feeling down
I’ve always been scared of the sound
Jesus don’t love me, no one ever carried my load
I’m too young to feel this old

Here’s to you, here’s to me
On to us. Nobody knows, nobody sees.

   Nobody but me.         

Late Weekend Recollection

I know, I’m nowhere to be found. I don’t update my blog like I used to and I haven’t painted anything in a while. Why? Life happened. I’ve been focusing more on my exams, and last weekend was also my favourite person’s birthday, so I was busy with family visits and gatherings. I wish I had something interesting to say, or some painting idea to share with all of you, but the truth is that I don’t. I could tell you about International Tax Law, or about Philosophy of Law, but I have a feeling that you might not find that thrilling at all! I can’t tease and embarrass my friends on my blog either, because they’re also struggling with real life obligations and the only time I had to actually go out a bit and enjoy myself was yesterday after the could-have-been-a-disaster-but-maybe-I-pulled-it-off  International Tax Law exam

Post exam celebration

So, as a way of compensation for my lack of eloquence right now, I am going to show you the song that has been in my head lately.

Like I said, last weekend was my brother’s birthday. I still owe him his present (I have NOT forgotten), but when I’m  on my exam period I have very little time to do anything besides wallowing in my pain and actually studying, so the only thing I could do for him was to help him (or should I rather say make him help me?) bake a NY Cheesecake to celebrate his new year of wisdom. Here are some pictures of both the baking process and the celebration.

Last week I also received the Agnes Cecile’s artwork that I ordered on Society6! I can’t wait to put it up on my wall. I am IN LOVE with it.

Having said all this, I promise I will try to send little “I am still alive” signs every now and then while my exam period is still going on!

xx